iLoveYou
by Alice'sDualPersonality
Summary: Freddie is 16 and likes Spencer. Can he tell him or will he suck it up and stay quiet? Warnings: Slash No likey no read! Cutting and Male smex! Don't flame! I do not own iCarly in anyway.
1. Chapter 1

Hi there! Been awhile since i posted a story! Woohoo!!!! Well anyway I will be the Second to put up a male slash story for iCarly! SQUEEYes you heard right! I was just watchin the show and I was like ' I wanna read some Spencer and Freddie Slash!' Looked and there is only 1 on here!!!! So I will post some and maybe people will post more! Here ya go!

A 16 year old Freddie walked through the hall of his apartment building to the one place he really enjoyed going. Carly's apartment. Most would automaticaly think it was because of his huge crush on Carly that made him go there. Man, were they wrong! Freddie went to see Carly's older brother, Spencer. Freddie found out he was gay when he was 14. He had only been infatuated with Carly ( the only real girl he liked!), which he found was only because of the brotherly feeling that caused this to come on. Then there was Valerie, he had only convinced himself he liked her but he was dening that he didn't like girls. Freddie gave up the idea of liking girls after watching Spencer swim around in the pool at some hotel they were staying at for some art convention Spencer convinced them to going to. Freddie was mezmerized by Spencer's fit body and how the water dripped down his body when he got out of the pool. This led to Freddie having to run for the bathroom, which band him from the pool for the rest of the day thanks to the life guard.

For the next month he was depressed. Finding out he was gay made his life miserable since his mother was wanting grandkids so bad that she would look through baby name books and show them to Freddie to see what he thought. Then seeing that his feelings for Carly weren't what he thought they were made it worse. But to top it off he had a thing for Spencer! His Best friend's brother! Freddie thought about all this and he couldn't take it at times and resorted to cutting. Even when he did come to terms he became too addicted to stop. Two years of this caused his arms to look horribly scarred. Just about a week ago he had been cutting when he thought of something. He should tell Spence. What more harm could it do to his already messed up life.

So here he was. Freddie would be alone with Spencer for the day since Carly was spending the night at Sam's place. Plus Spencer said he needed a male model for his next sculpture so Freddie took a dive and volenteered. Thogh he hoped that it did not involve paper mache going around his body. Gross. Standing infront of the door made him kinda light headed. Pressure was pushing on his head and his heart sped up as he knocked. Suddenly it seemed like the world was going slow mo on him. The door knob and the door slowy open and there he was.

"Freddie?... Oh right!!!! Sorry Freddie I completely forgot about the project!" Spencer said quickly throwing his arms up in the air

"Oh... I guess I'll go home then."

Freddie felt very hurt that Spence had forgotten about him. He was about to turn when he felt his arm being grabbed.

" You can stay if ya want. I was just about to watch a movie and it would be awsome if you watched it with me! It's so lame to watch it by yourself, ya know." Spencer said eagerly with a huge smile that made Freddie woozy

"O-okay!" Freddie stuttered with his face starting to redden.

Spencer turned and made his way toward the T.V. with Freddie in tow. Both guys flopped down on the couch with a safe amount of distance between each other. Spencer reached his hand into the couch and started to dig around. His hand inched closer to Freddie's ass but then it popped out with the remote it hand.

" Aha! Found it!" He said like a child finding a peice of candy

'Holy crap! That was so close! Keep ahold of yourself Freddie just watch the movie' Freddie's thoughts screamed at the motion. He was glad when the movie started since it kept his mind off of Spencer. Though the movie was starting to bore him. Then he was out like a light. Spencer peeked over at him and saw that he was asleep and that his head was at a strange angle. He moved Freddie carefully to where his head was resting on Spencer's shoulder and Spence put his arm around his waist and began to watch the movie again.

When the credits began to apear on the screen Spence moved to wake Freddie. But stopped to admire Freddie's cute face. He brush some feathers that landed on Freddie's face off causeing him to stir. His big brown eyes sluggishly fluttered open. The first thing Freddie saw was Spencer's face super close to his face. Spencer swore that Freddie jumped about 6 feet in the air. Freddie's face was a bright red and his heart was close to ripping out of his chest. He jumped up from the couch and store down at spencer before stuttering out a goodbye and making a run for it. Spencer jumped up and made a dash for him. Spence quickly grabbed hold of Freddie's wrist, causeing Freddie to wince and let out a whimper. This didn't go unnoticed to Spence. He rolled up Freddie's sleeve and was horrified at the sight.

" Oh my god... Freddie why did you do this to yourself?" Spence whispered loud enough for him to hear.

It all became to much for Freddie. He broke down right there and then. Sobs racked his body and his legs decided to give out .

" Please don't hate me! Please don't hate me! Please don't..." He sobbed bending over in a defeated pose.

" Freddie... oh freddie... I could never hate you. Even if you did cut yourself I could never. But why would you do it?" Spencer said in a comforting tone

He sat on the ground and pulled Freddie into his lap where he placed his hand softly on the back on the sobbing teens head and using the other to stroke his back. Freddie dug his dface into Spencer's sholder and weeped silently. He turned his head and looked up at Spencer's face. Spence looked really worried for him.

" I did it cause I couldn't handle the thought of..." He couldn't say it.

" Thought of what? Freddie I want to help you please tell be." Spence pleaded

Freddie looked up into Spencer's concerned face. Guilt bubbled up int his stomach.

" The thought of being gay."

Spencer looked down in shock but his face quickily changed into a small smile. He leaned down and looked into freddie's eyes.

" Freddie, Don't ever do it again. I love you and don't want to see you hurting" And with that Spencer pressed his lips against Freddies.'

Freddie's Eyes grew wide but fluttered closed and kissed Spencer back. Wrapping his small slender arms around the older man's neck, Spence placed his arms arounf Freddie's back and under his knees and lifted him bridle style. Walking to his room they had to break for air so he could figure out where he was headin. Once at his door he turned the knob and proceeded to kiss Freddie. Spence was very careful to lay freddie on the bed without breaking contact loss. He licked Freddie's lip hoping for entrance which he got and began to kiss him passionatly. Spencer's hand ran down Freddie's chest then back under the dark shirt that clothed his chest.

Freddie shook with pleasure as Spence's hand ghosted over one of his nipples setting off a moan. Spence smiled at the sound that the smaller boy was making and hoped to elict more. He slid the annoying peice of cloth off and nibbled on Freddie's collarbone. Kissling his way down Freddie's chest he gave a quick lick on each on the now hard nipples and continued his way down, being sure to dip his tounge into the navel. Spence stopped.

Freddie lifted up on his elbows to see why Spencer was not doing anything. Spence Sat up and store down at Freddie's pants then up at the teens face. He quirked an eyebrow and waited. Freddie caught on and began removing his pants while Spence removed all his clothing. Spence crawled back up on Freddie and leaned down next to his ear.

" Tell me you want this. Tell me why you want it. If not we can stop now and forget about this. If we continue you are mine and no one elses." Spence whisper huskily

Freddie Thought about it for a few minutes. He wrapped his arms around the older mans neck and look into his eyes.

"I want this so bad Spencer. I have for 2 years. I think I love you and I will always be yours for as long as you'll take me. I promise from the depths of my heart." And to seal this little speech he kissed Spencer. Softly but with the right amount of vigor he could muster.

Spencer pressed back with a smile forming into the kiss.He lifted away from the kiss and made his way down Freddie's smaller body till he was looking at Freddie's erection. Spence took the head into his moth and swirled his tounge around the top and into the slit, then he engulfed the entire length. Freddie almost screamed when Spence took him into his mouth and arched so far back it looked as though he was about to snap his back in two. He brought his arm over his mouth and bit so hard down he broke the skin and the blood slid down his chin and onto the pillow.

Spence sensed he was close and stopped. Looking up he saw the blood and reached forward to remove Freddie's arm from his mouth. He lapped at the blood still flowing and kissed Freddie deeply.

" I want to hear all the sounds you make. They're kinky!" Spence smiled widely at the last part while Freddie thought he would permenetly stay red.

Leaning over to the bed side cabinet, Spence opened the top drawer and plucked up a bottle of lubricant. Freddie gave him a wondering look.

" It helps me when I get my arm stuck in somethin" That's all Freddie needed to know.

Spencer applied some of the lube to his fingers and placed the bottle on the stand. He placed a finger at Freddie's entrance and began to push it in. The finger began it's quest for the spot that would cause Freddie to wither. after a minute or two he hit it. Freddie moaned and squirmed at the pleasurable feelings he was experiancing. Spence began adding two more fingers and when he was sure that the teen was loose he removed them. Freddie whined at the lost but saw Spence lubing up his erection and shut up.

" If it hurts tell me alright. No holding up I want to be sure I don't hurt you in anyway." Spencer said seriously

Freddie nodded and felt Spence's tip at his entrance and felt it push in. It stung a bit but not much till Spencer pushed further and he let out pained whimper. Spence heard it and stopped. He bent over and softly rubbed the side of Freddie's face until he got the okay to keep going. Spence thrust forward until he was at the hilt and gave Frreddie time to adjust. When he was sure Freddie was ready he pulled back and thrust forward. He kept a slow and steady rythem. Though this was not Freddie's desire.

" Go faster and harder" Freddie moaned

Spence readily agreed and began pounding into the smaller body. Feeling close to spilling Spencer fisted Freddie's erection and started to give him a hand job. Both Males where moaning louder and louder that the neighbors could probly hear. Freddie felt the pressure build in his groin and knew he would scream, so he yanked Spencers head down and kissed him roughly. He spilled all of his essence on his and Spencer stomach and Spence's hand. The contractons on Spencer's cock felt amazing and soon he was filling Freddie with cum. Both screamed into eachother's mouths. A couple of more thrusts and pulling himself out, Spence flopped down next to Freddie. Pulling Freddie next to him. Freddie rested head on Spencer's shoulder and lazily traced his finger on Spence's stomach. Spencer wrpped his arms posesivly around Freidde's back and waist. Kissing the top of the teen's head and smiling.

" That was amazing! Freddie, I love you." Spencer exclaimed

Freddie's eyes widened at the statemant and then closed. He began to cry and smile at the same time.

" Freddie? What's wrong?" Spencer said in a worried tone

" Nothing. I am just so happy. I love you Spence. I am so SO happy that you feel the same." Freddie cried

He was happy. Words were far from explaining how he felt so happy would have to do. Freddie fell asleep with a smile on his face. Spencer did the same but not with out saying a promise.

"I want to make you happy. All the time Freddie. I love you more than you would beleive. Hopefuly this will stop the pain you feel" Then falling into a peaceful sleep.

Wooo! That was fun! I might continue this if you all liked the first chapter. So many ideas for the next part! Please tell me what ya think!


	2. Chapter 2

((((Yay! People liked it! Well I am happily continuing this! Also thank you very much Sare15, I am using your idea for this chapter!))))

Carly opened the door to see that no one was in the living room. Easily she assumed that maybe Spencer had went out to do something. ( Who knows, it's Spencer)

Carly had accidently left her sleeping bag here and needed to grab it since Sam had spilled orange pop all over her bed. Quickly heading toward the stairs, stopping

short when she heard rustling from Spencer's room.

"Must be home. Better check to see if he's all right. It is only 7." Carly mumbled

Heading toward the slightly opened door she clutched the doorknob and pushed open. The sight stunned her. There laid Freddie, naked, with Spencer cuddling next to him, also naked.

"Oh my God!" She said, Not to loud but loud enough that it woke Freddie

Freddie stirred and rubbed his eyes. He was about to turn over and cling to the warmth next to him when he heard a voice. immedietly he sat up and saw one of his best friend's

standing there, petrified. Wide eyes he opened his mouth but he could not say a single word.

"Freddie what are you doing in Spencer's bed?"

Carly looked as though she was on the verge of tears. Freddie could feel the disgust and pain rolling off of her.

"Carly, I.. I was..." Freddie never got to finish

"Freddie I want you to leave and not wake Spencer. I want you to never talk to me or Spencer nor do I want to see your face. Got it?" Carly whispered angrily

Carly was seething. She was not a homophobe but she didn't like them too well. Seeing her best friend and her brother together throughly disgusted her.

"Please Carly, don't do this. I love him and you are my best friend. I'm sorry! Please just don't" Freddie trailed off, glancing at Spencer peacefully sleep, unaware of what was happening

"There are no appoligies I will except. When I get back you better be gone or I'll do something drastic. I think Spencer will more than likely take my side than yours. He probly just needed a quick

fuck anyway."

With that said Carly left. Forgeting what she ad came for in the first place.

Freddie slipped out of bed, carefull not to wake Spence and dressing. With every article of clothing another tremor of sobs filled him. Freddie looked down out at Spence and thought about what Carly had told

him. Maybe he was a quick screw. Maybe he seemed easy to get into bed. Maybe all the things Spencer had said were lies. A rustle caught him off guard. Spence was waking. One Blink. Then another. Freddie was frozen to the floor. A concerned look crossed Spencer's face as he saw the tears still streaming down his lovers face.

"Freddie, what's wrong?" He reached out to touch Freddie's arm. This caused the teen to awake from his stuper. He jerked away.

" I don't want to be lied to and the be a fuck toy. I don't want anything to do with you if that's what you think I am!" Freddie yelled

Freddie took off. Dashing out the door and out of the building. Spence was left in the bed, supprised. What the hell was going on. He thought Freddie knew he loved him. He was sure he had said and showed how he felt. The teen was in so much pain that he had hoped he had soothed him.

"Oh God! I gotta find him!"

Jumping out of bed and grabbing on random clothing he took off to the street.

(Following Freddie now)

Freddie had ran and ran until he was lost. He began walking around in hopes his pain would leave him. Freddie was freezing at this point. It was the dead of winter and snow had been falling for sometime now. A bridge appeared in his view. it stood over a creek that was fairly deep from the look of how dark the water was but he couldn't be sure. He store into the dark water waiting for some kind of anwser to come to him. Then it hit him.

"I should jump. The water is freezing so it should be quick."

Climbing onto the rail. He looked both ways to be sure no one would come and stop him. A pair of head lights were turning onto the street. Freddie panicked. His mind began to fight on whether or not to leap. Unfourtanatly he would not have a choice. Freddie's balance gave and he fell from the rail, cracking his head onto the concrete rail and falling into the pitch black water.

(((Cliff hanger! Haha I have to do it! Will he be saved or will he die! I choose! Find out next chap! I will post it when I hear more reviews to be sure if I should keep this fic alive or murder it!))))


	3. Chapter 3

((((((Loving the reveiws! Thanks so much for likin the story! I never planned on making Carly such a bitch but it kinda fit. Thank you all! And Thank you very much Child-Of-Oturn! Can't believe someone thinks my story is that great that they would call it the Holy Grail of the section lol! But it totally fuels me to write the next chapter!)))))))

Spencer had been looking for about an hour for Freddie. He was growing tired from the ongoing search and yet scared at what could possibly have happen to him. Being in a city caused there to be a high possiable amount of dangers. Gang shootings, Murders, Hitt and Run. The possibilities were endless.Hopefully the chocies running through Spencer's head weren't true. Turning his small car (I do not have a clue if he drives or not) onto the next street. That's when he saw it. He watched as a young man slipped off the icey bridge and tumble into the water below. Spence couldn't make out his features but he had to save him. Spencer glanced at the clock and saw that it was half past eight and still no Freddie. Chewing on his lip, Spence decided that Freddie might be at home and right now this guy needed help. Being the nice guy he was there was no way he could leave him to die.

Leaping out of the car and dashing toward the slope that lead down the side of the bridge. Sliding down most of the way since it was slicked with some ice. Spencer stopped and scanned the calm surface of the creek. He guess that it was much deeper than 2 feet so the guy might be way at the bottom.

" I have to call the ambulance so thart the guy doesn't die, if not already, when I pull him out." with that said he pulled out his cell and quickly dialed while starting his journey into the water.

The water stung and his legs were slowly going numb as he sloshed across the creek. Teeth chattering he quickly told the operator the situation and where he was located and hung up. Spence felt the bottom of the creek with his foot and halfway across the water hit something soft. Spencer left out a sigh of relief but shook from the anticiption that the guy would be a corspe when he yanked him out.

"Please don't be dead. I got to much on my mind now for you to add."

Reaching under the stinging ice water he grabbed a hand full of fabric and pulled. A soft gasp left his mouth. There in his hands was Freddie. Spencer reacted quickly and drug the teen to the edge of the creek and up the hill. Gently he laid him on the sidewalf and ripped off his coat to wrapp around Freddie. Spencer finally noticed the hot tears running down his face. He leaned down and buried his face into Freddie's chest and sobbed. The young boy was pale with a blueish hue taking over his once pink lips.His pulse was there but just slightly there. For a moment Spencer could not do a thing but cry his eyes out.

Sirens filled the air and in minutes an anbulance was rushing around him. Shoving Spence to the side and clamboring to place Freddie on the strecher and pull him into the van. Before they could close the doors Spencer stuck his hand in the way.

"Let me come! I am a friend of his!" He cried out

"... Alright. Hurry in!" The man in the ambulance uniform quickly responded

Clamboring in and stitting as close as he could to his lover he weeped as he watched the scene going on around him. Almost as if in slow motion. The veichle came to a stop and everyone rushed to get Freddie inside. But Spencer sat there. Thinking about what freddie had said. It echoed throughout his mind. Why would Freddie think these things? Hopefully Spencer could ask him if he lived.

Speeding 2 hours ahead!

In the 2 hours Freddie's mother was called and in no less than 10 minutes was there. Throwing a hysterical fit and trying to make her way to her boy. Spence called up Carly and told what had happened. She said she would go over there with Sam. Carly sound like she was on the verge of tears. Soon tSpencer saw the two teen girls rush into the waiting room. Carly stood over in a corner. Not crying but almost looked guilty. Sam on the other hand looked as if she had cried on the way over.

"Spencer! What happened? Is he alright?! Oh my God! If he dies..." She broke off into sobs

Spencer huged her tightly and soothed her.

"That booger breath isn't allowed to die! Imight be mean to him but he's still my friend! And I think of him as a dorky brother! I can't lose him! He means to mmuch!" She cried out.

"Don't worry. He''ll be alright. I am sure of it." He whispered. It was mostly to himself.

Spence looked up and saw Carly chew on her thumb and glance quickly around. 'Why is she so nervous?' Spencer didn't understand why Carly wasn't doing anything but look as if she had done a horrible deed. Before he could ask a male doctor walked in. Clearing his troat he began to speak.

"I am here for the family of Fredrick Benson."

Eveyone rushed to see what the doctor had to say. All but Carly. This time Sam noticed and was a little curios to find out why.

"Well Fredrick seems to be fine but he seems to have suffered severe head trama and we won't know the extent of the damage until he is awake. That is if he does."

"What do mean 'if he does'?!" Mrs. Benson screeched

"Well you see the damage is quite severe that he could stay unconcious for a good period of time or possibly for the rest of his life." The doctor said calmly.

The doctor may have been calm but the room was full of despair.

(((((((((((Yeppers Freddie lives! But will he wake! I am a cliffie person! I keep you on end. Seems that Carly is feeling guilty!)))))))))))))


	4. Chapter 4

(((((Woohooo! Another chap! This one will be full of sad crap and action!)))))

Spencer sat next to Freddie as he watched the young man's chest raise and fall. It would be a nice sight

if it did not include the wires attached to the small body and the breathing tube shoved in his throat. The

week had past quickly. During the first few days Freddies's mother had wanted Spencer no where near her

son but fell into a state of deprssion and stopped coming at all when she saw no sign of her son waking.

Spencer felt tears collect in his eyes and held them back and not letting them fall, since that meant he had

given up all hope. He would never abandon Freddie.He couldn't now that he had caught him. But that was a slow

losing battle. Sam also would not give up hope. She came by for an hour everyday to check on him and said that she

was sure he would wake. Carly though never came and when he had to leave and head back to the apartment she sat on

the couch iddely flipping through channels and happily talking to friends on the phone.

Carly didn't care and Spence saw it. He had given up on her and barely spoke to her and tried to avoide her at all costs.

Tonight would be easy to do just that. He had gotten perrmission to stay all nighters now. Lifting a hand he slowly rubbed

Freddie's face loveingly with a sad smile.

"Wake up Freddie. I have to tell you so much and yet I have so much to ask. I don't want this to be the last memory I have of

us together. I love you so much." Only one tear escaped and slid down Spencer's face and lightly fell on the teen's hand.

Unoticed the hand twiched.

(Spencer's apartment)

Sam was pissed! Carly had been acting so cheerful since Freddie's hospitalization. She didn't even seem to care the slightest.

Sam saw the guilt that night of Freddie's accident. The way Carly's eyes quickly darted about. Anwsers were needed. Whether

they had to be forced out or not.

Sam pounded on the door. Almost as if she were punching it. A pair of footsteps were heard from behind the door and the door

swung open to reveal the person Sam was about to beat the crap out of.

"Oh! Sam! What are you doing here? I would have made something if I knew you were coming! Come on in!" Carly said with a wide Smile, quickly

moving aside

Sam trudged in all the way to the middle of the room before turning sharply on her heels. Glaring at Carly with such intensity Carly flinched.

As soon as the door was closed the anger burst out.

"What the hell is the matter with you?! Freddie's in the hospital in a coma and your here having the best fucking time of YOUR life!" Sam roared

"Wha... I have been worried too! I just felt that it was my responsibility to be calm about the situation!" Carly cried out

"Real now?! I beg to differ! I saw the way you looked guilty at the hospital. Your hiding somethin and I wanna know what!"

"I was upset! I was..." Carly was ubrptly cut off when a punch hit her straight in the mouth. Staring up from the floor in shock watched Sam seeth.

"Upset? UPSET?! I doubt that! You are guilty aren't you?! Tell me now Carly or else I will beat the shit out of ya!" Sam screamed out

Carly jumped up and tried punching at Sam but was to slow and received a quick to the stomach. Falling to her knees, clutching her stomach

and gasping in pain. Carly's long hair was yank on to force her head backwards to stare into Sam's angry face. She knew that Sam could do some

serious damage and had no chance. A deep cut already was fair enough warning. Carly let it spill.

" I walked in on Freddie and Spencer sleeping together! I told Freddie it was disgusting nd to leave! That's all!"

"You WHAT?!" Sam cried out

"It was disgusting! My brother is not a fag! Freddie must have drugged him or something! I hate Freddie! Gays are not right in anyway!" Carly stated angryily

" How could you! Freddie loves Spence you stupid bictch! And Spencer does too! I am so fucking happy to know they are together. But so Fucking PISSED that

you ruined it! They deserve the happiness! You always think the world revolves around well check this! It doesn't! And you know what else your a traitor!" Sam threw

Carly down and ran out of there so she wouldn't worry about going to prison for murder.

(Hospital)

Spencer slept limply in the bedside chair occasionaly twitching and mumbling in his sleep. Not knowing that two brown eyes were staring at him intently.

(Yes I know I just had to stop it there didn't I! Well it was never the plan to make Carly a complete bitch but it had to happen. I have nothing against her but

that's just how she is in my story! Sorry to all the Carly fans! Hoped you likey! What will happen next?! You have to wait to find out! HaHa I am so mean! But I love

the reveiws keep 'em comin!)


	5. Chapter 5

((Wow I got more reviews!! Love em! I guess I'll update it!))

Freddie took a look around but saw very little from where he lay. Trying to move led to painful gaging on the tube,

so laying was much more prefferred. The starch white color and the smell of antistetic gave him a good clue on where he was.

He tried moving his legs and arms. Fearing that maybe the fall had caused him the loss of movement. Happily his limbs moved but

were very stiff. The tube was very uncomfortable and ripping it out seemed like a great idea (No it isn't!!). Reaching up with his left arm, Freddie

grasped the tube. A swift yank and the tube was out. Though it hurt like a bitch!(Told ya) Tears escaped his eyes as he gripped his troat and

coughed violently.

Movement to his side remided him that he was not alone. Spencer was stirring in the chair left of him. Scarred freiddie tried to leave the confindment

of his bed only to fall to the cold floor and bmping his head against the tile. A yelp escaped his throat. The bump would never have hurt this bad before.

But there was bandaging all around his head. Freddie was really scarred now. Something was really wrong with him. Blood was on his finger tips.

Tears were falling as he store at his hand. What had he done? He fell and that was it. Freddie tried hard to remember everything after that but nothing

came to him. Freddie knew he should be dead. And yet he wasn't. Caught out of his thought he heard a gasp and heavy footsteps taking off toward the door.

"Nurse! NURSE! The boy in here is missing!" Spencer sound scared and strained.

"spencer..." Freddie's voice was no louder than a whisper but he couldn't say anything else without tremendous pain echoing throgh his throat

The footsteps rushed toward his side of the bed. A tearstricken face showed releif. Spencer fell to his knees and hugged Freddie tightly.Kisses fell lightly on

the top of his head.

"Thought I lost you again. Don't do that again. Coulda gave me a heartattack..." Spencer was mumblin into freddie's hair but was still audible.

"Spencer I... I'm sorry.. I was stupid... but ... I was scared!" Freddie broke down and sobbed good and hard into Spencer's chest.

Spence looked down at the shaking body. Tears formed in his eyes and spilled over onto Freddie. Soon both were sobbing.

Footsteps were left unheard as a intruder entered. The intruder smiled fondly at the two but broke it up just as quick as the smile

appeared.

"Alright you tards! Up! Freddie needs to get back into bed." Sam yelled out

Scared of the sudden yell they both shrieked. Before embarrisingly getting up. Freddie climbed back into the starch white sheets

as Spence sat at the seat next to him. Freddie quickly was scared that maybe Sam would get angry like Carly had and not

want a thing to do with him.

"Wipe that scared look off your face ya baby! I ain't going to leave ya over who you chose to like!" Sam announced

Freddie couldn't stop smiling at the knowledge that Sam would not leave him over his sexuality. Though he noticed Sam's face took

on a sad appearence.

"Sam what's wrong?"

"I can't believe that our group has broke. All over such a stupid thing. I am so hppy Freddie, for you. But super depressed that Carly went and almost

ruined it over such a stupid childish thing." Sam's face hardened with anger.

"What? What does Carly have to do with our realationship?"

Both Freddie and Sam turned and store at Spencer in complete fear and supprise. Could they tell him?

(( Sorry written quickly! BWHAHAHA MORE CLIFFES!! Sorry for any spelling errors. Too tired to look for them...Also sorry it is short!)))))


	6. Chapter 6

Wow! I am totally horrid for not updating sooner! But i started writing another fic and then I started

back on writing this but ended up having both stories clashing! So on with the story!!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Spencer looked at the two teens who store back. Sam reacted before them and began walking

toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Freddie asked, worried to be left with explaining

"Freddie, You need to explain this... I am here for ya but I really thinK you have to tell Spence,

not me." Sam said with a sad smile.

Twirling on her heel she left through the white door. Sam hoped that Freddie could do this on

his own, she knew she couldn't since she might blow up and go crazy. Leaning against the wall,

Sam sighed and stared at the oppisite wall.

Inside the room Freddie gaped at the door like a fish out of water. What the hell as he going to

say?! This was Spencer's sister and his exbest friend. The last part gripped his heart tighly. How

could she do that? After everything they had been through. Wasn't a friend supposed to stand by

you and support you? Carly wasn't that kind of friend he thought. Tears formed in his eyes at the

thought. Not tears of saddness but pure anger. Freddie gripped his face and screamed into his palms.

Spencer rushed over to his side trying to see what was troubling his young lover. Thinking he was

maybe in pain he coaxed him to lay down.

"Freddie are you in pain? Icould get the..." Spencer was stopped by a pair of soft lips covering his.

It was a short tender kiss but it shut Spencer up. A serious look covered Freddie's usaual soft face.

"Spence... The night I took off was cause Carly saw us together..."

"So? She knows, so what. I am sure she is happy for us." Spence grinned at the very thought f his baby

sister supporting their love.

"eh... no that isn't the reason I left." Freddie said slowly

"Huh? Then why?" Spencer was becoming very confused

"She said it was isgusting and that... I... I..." Freddie chocked on his words and tears began to flow.

"What did she say, Freddie?"

"She said that I was a quick fuck and that she never wanted to see me again!"

The younger teen's body shoke as sobs over took him. Tears rushing down like waterfalls. It just hurt.

Everything just hurt. His head and his entire body hurt. Enen his heart felt like it just may give out on him.

Would Sencer believe him or Carly? Blood was thicker than water but did that mean love

wasn't?

"Freddie... She said that?" Spencer whispered as if t was hard to believe.

And to him it was. Carly was spposed to support his choice not abbondon her own friend over it. Spencer

had to figure this out. He could not idaly stand by and watch his lover cry and suffer even at his own sister's

expense. Carly maybe his sister but he loved Freddie too much to let her destroy that. Spencer hugged Freddie

tightly and kissed the top of his head while whispering apologies and sweet words. The trembling stopped and

hiccups filled the room. Spencer smiled and looked down at the red tear stained face with amusement.

"You so CUTE!!" He squeeled causing Freddie to giggle.

"I love ya and I ant to make things right so you are always happy." With that Spencer let go of Freddie and

walked toward the door and left.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

For hw long i left you guys hanging I sure had a crappy attempt on making it up!! But not to worry

I will update more quickly. I wonder what's gonna happen! Oh wait I'm the author! Bwhahaha!!


	7. Chapter 7

Long wait but being busy and starting other stories kinda helps. I really feel bad for keeping you

all waiting but I tried to figure what should happen. Will Carly get or will Spencer fall into a trap?

Let's find out!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Carly walked back and forth, wondering what to do. Her face hurt and there were brusies forming

on her face. Spencer probly found out about what she did but he would think it was all lies right?

If not then she would be sure to convince him otherwise. Carly was his babysister and a good lier

if she thought so herself. Grinning broadly, a great lie flew into her mind and just in time.

The door clicked from a key unlocking it and tears began to flow. She spun around and rushed

into Spencer. Holding tightly to his coat as Carly sobbed.

"Spencer! I was so scared! Sam... Sam came in and beat me up! Telling me that I was going to

keep my mouth shut or she would... she would.. hurt me really bad and be sure to break my jaw

so I wouldn't talk!" She cried out

Spence looked to see her face had many dark brusises on it and thy were swelling horribly.

He store in shock. Sam did this? But why?

" Keep your mouth shut about what?" Spence said in horror at the tought that Sam could even do

this to her own friend

"I was going to tell you sooner but I would have betrayed them but it went so far..." Carly whispered

"What? What went to far?"

" Freddie always found you attractve so he planned to sleep with you to see if you were god in bed.

Sam wanted to know too since she wanted to sleep with you too. The planned to make you sleep with

Frddie. At first it started out like some little thing. Nothing big. But then a couple of days before Freddie

came over and slept with you, I found Freddie... at... at..."

"Where was Freddie?" Spencer was growing paler by the second

"At a bar with a whole bunch of different guys! I didn't say anything but I followed him... I know spying is

bad but I was worrid about him. They all went to one of the men's apartments ad... I herd noises! They

were screwing Spencer! Freddie was... oh my GOD! i can't believe he did this! I know this hurts you

and I never wanted to say a word but then I saw you guys together and he threatened me! I told

him I would tell you so he couldn't hurt you at all! But Freddie said he wold kill himself if I did just to make

me feel guilty! And he... he did. Why Spence?! Why?! I thought we were reat friends?! Then he told Sam

and she came here!" Carly let out a big sob and shook in Spencer's arm's

It all seemed to fit but was it true? He didn't know but Carly seemed to be telling the truth. She never lied to his

face. He knew it. So Freddie used him? It was tering his heart apart. Spence loved Freddie with all his heart.

Tears clouded his vision and spilled over his face. So stupid! Those cuts were part of the act too! Why did

this all have to happen! Even his baby sister got stuck in the cross fire! Spencer belived every word because

Carly was crying and in pain. It was too much.

" Sorry Carly I... I have to go to my room and rest. I really hurt..." Spence whispered

"Of course. I understand... I'm just so sorry.." She kissed his forehead and watched as he walked to his room

and made sure it was closed.

Smiling and dancing silently upstairs she grabbed her cell phone and plped onto her bed. Dialing up Sam's number she

listed to it ring.

(At the hospital)

Sam jumped as she heard the phone ring loudly from Freddie's bedside table.

"Opps! Forgot to put it on virbrait. haha..." Picking it up a look of shock crossed her face

"Who is it?" Freddie was happy as could be that nothing could dampen his mood

"Carly."

Except that. Sam flipped it open and let out a growl that sounded like a a what.

"Hello there Sam! Nice to hear you again! Put Freddie on will you?"

"Why should I? You've hurt him enough." Sam growled like a wild animal

"Acctully I think he would like to hear this. And it would save hm the trouble of finding out the hard way. It could make

things much worse!"

Sam looked wearly over at Freddie before holding out the phone. She didn't want any more harm for Freddie than he was

in already.

"Hello?" Freddie anwsered

"Ahhh Freddie. Wanted to let you know that you won't be seeing Spence anymore."

"What? Why?!" His heart was beating hard as could be.

" Hmmm... Well h believes you only wanted him for sex and that your a total slut! Also that Sam is in on everything too.

He thinks you went and almost killed yourself just to cause me to feel guilty... and you know what? he ate up everyword of

it thanks to my little sob fest and the brusies Sam gave me. If I were you I would stay away from me or I could get Spence to beat

the shit out of you. Oh.. don't tell sam about any of this. I would rather keep her as a friend. Tell her we came to a truths got it? Bye-

Bye!" Carly said cheerfully before hanging up.

"What did the bitch say?!" Sam yelled

"We cam to a truths... It's all good. She said se was sooo sorry about what she did."

"I don't believe you wh-"

"Ma'am I am going to have to ask you to leave. Vistor time is up." A nurse said cheerfully

"... I will find out Freddie. One way or another!" Sam yelled back as she left.

Freddie gripped the blanket tightly, watching his fists turn white. Spencer didn't believ him at all?

It grew dark as the nurse flicked off the lights. Signaling it was time for bed at the hospital. For

Freddie it was time for tears to spill like rivers. His heart couldn't take it. It shattered in his chest.

It was hard to believe but Carly won and he lost everything. He couldn't stay. Not here since it

reminded him that Spence wouldn't be there to kiss him when he slept or be there at all. Freddie

had a plan. All he would have to do is wait till it got quieter here.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Uh-Oh! What is he planning?! Damn I really am maing Carly to be the bitch! Oh well! Till next chapter!


	8. Chapter 8

(((((Yay the next one!! I am quick hehe!))))

Freddie store at the digital bedside clock as it read 1:33 a.m. Time to set the plan into motion.

The hospital was so quiet. Only a few nurses had the night shift and they usally lazied about at the front desk

as what Spence told him when he went to go find one. Pushing himself up, he had to be quick. The heart

monitor would go off sending all nurses in his direction. Only giving him time to run for his clothing and

shoes that were setting next to the door. He could slip them on as soon as he had made it far away

from the hospital.

Freddie counted to 10 before ripping all the cords off, which hurt horribly! Leaving the heart monitor last.

Positioning on the edge of the bed, he stood on weak legs but they would get Freddie far enough hopefully.

Ripping the cord off, aloud siren went off from the monitor, signalling time to run. Taking off quickly he grabbed

his pants and slipped into the tennies on the floor along with a jacket hanging on a hook. (So glad mommy is

overprotective and thinks ahead huh?) Rushing down the over way of the hall he saw a map on the corner.

Studying it carefully he saw the operating elevator in which gurnerys would go on just around the ext corner.

Running down that way. Pain was over driving his systems but he couldn't stop now. Pushing the button,

it arrived fairly quick. Jumping in Freddie pressed the first floor button and listened to the cheesy elevator

music. At the bottom the Emergancy entrance was a few feet to his right. Freddie dashed for them and listed

to footsteps resounding from the hallways.

Out the entrance and into the cold, biting air, Freddie ran for all he was worth. He ran and ran and looked back to see the

hospital was out of sight. Yanking is blue jeans on he began to relize he had no way of traveling or staying anywhere!

Trecking own an alley heated tears trailed down his face, thinking of how stupid he could be to leave his wallet on the bedside table.

The adrenilline had caused im to be so caught up in escaping that he totally forgot about it. Taking a corner he curled into

a sitting fetal position and hoped the death would veer away along with all strangers that could result in servere injuries.

The numbing cold caused him to forget all about the bodily pain but focuse on the internal pain. Emotions dragged out

and caused tears to further gush. If only Freddie had stayed home that night, kept his moth shut, none of this would be happening.

Freddie woul be in a warm bed having a sweet dream of Spencer and... If none of this had happened then he wuld never had

felt the love and lust Spence held for him. In away all this suffering was worth it. To keep the memories of what was and treasuring

them, knowing all that was gone. But pain was still fresh from betral and heartbreak. Also a pain to knowing that Spencer thought

he had betrayed him was the worst.

A promise was broken within that instant. A shard of broken glass shone beautifully in the moon light. Crimson would add to the

beauty and lessen the pain all in one way. A slice and warm blood heated the sin it touched but left it freezing with in a second.

Freddie made sure the cut was deep enough to draw enough blood but not to kill him. in the hopes that maybe, just maybe a

small spark of love would over come the lies Carely had tainted Spence's mind with.

The night drew on and Freddie stayed in the position staring at his wrists into the morning. Feeling it was time to leave, Freddie

thought of heading to the park and search for change in hopes of getting enough to get a bus ticket to another city. The walk

was taking a harsh toll on him but what other choice was he faced with? He would be screwed if he went back so heading

forward was the only way to go.

(Spencer's apartment)

A loud ramming of fists against wood caused an abrubt start to Spencer's morning. Hoping Carly would get it was but a dream since

she left for school an hour ago. Crawling out of bed and to the door was a mighty task so Spence was very glad he went to

slep in only his clothing instead of changing. Of course he would have put on pajamas if it weren't for the fact that he fell

asleep while sobbing his eyes out. The painstill lingered in his chest. Betral had a horrid taste to it and nothing

would wash that out. Anger also welled up deep within his stomach knowing Freddie had taken him and played

with his emotions. If he saw him again he knew rage would cause Spence to send Freddie back to the hospital.

Not just for him but treating his poor baby sister like he had.

The walk was longer than it should have been and caused the person on the other side to grow angrier. It

sounded as though they were taking somethig to break down the apartment door. Carefully twisting it open,

so as not to get hit, Spencer saw a Tear streaked, shaking, gasping women at the door. But not any women

but Freddie's mom, Mrs. Benson.

"What did you do?! What the hell fdid you do?!" She broke out yelling, wrenching her hands into his shirt and

dragging Spence fac level.

"What do you mean?"

"My son! What did you do to him?!" She howled

"Me?! I didn't do a thing! Talk to your son! He's the one going around hurting others!" Spence threw her hands off him

"What? What are you talking ab-... Oh! You frickin idot! My son has not done a thing! Your the one too stupid to

see who to trust! My son never lies to you. I know. But Carly, that little witch, has you following her like a dog that

you can''t see that she can't stand to have your attention drawn away from, especialy my son! I should Castrate

you for the hell my son is going threw! He-..He-.. OH MY GOD!!" Mrs. Benson fell to her knees and sobbed

"You knew? Bu-But how?!" Spencer stood nailed in shock

"I'm... was a mother. AHHH!! FREDDIE!!" She just kept going on and on.

"What happened to Freddie... Wait! Why should I care? Carly said-"

"Moron."

Turning his head he saw long blond hair and a fearful Sam.

"Listen to this... I knew Carly would pull this so I recorded the conversation to my phone. I knew you would need some

convincing to believe Freddie truely loves you." Holding out her flipp phone for Spencer to take.

Shaking hands grasped the phone. Scared to hear this more than anything else. But as the converstaion went on

in the recording he knew he knew he had made a grave mistake.

"Where is Freddie?"

"... He ran away from the hospital last night."

Those words caused Spencer to truely see that he may have just caused his one and only love's death over a

his stupid mistake.

((Yay! I made sure to finish this just for you guys! But another cliffie hehe!! I know I suck!))


	9. Chapter 9

It's hard to believe so many like this story... err it sucks so you know. I can do better I think....

Plus all the spelling errors!!! I never go back to check on!! I really need too! Oh well on with the story!

******************************************

Spencer dashed out of the apartment and down the several flights of staris to the lobby. Footsteps sounded behind him but he was too distracted to care. He rushed for the door when a body flung into him causing him to eat tile. The weight was heavy and the blood pooling from his nose was not a pleasant thing at the moment.

"May I ask you something?" A female voice spoke

"Uhhh...Yes Sam?"

"First you are in boxers, running through the place like a bat of Hell. Oh and here's the question! How do you know where Freddie is? Hmmm?" the tone bit him hard

"Haha... I forgot.... and I was going to look?"

"Wrong! You will get dressed so you aren't taken to the insane asylum! Then we make a plan! And no cops! They won't find him since they are too fucking stupid to care about him!"

Sam really did despise cops but she was right. In more than one way. Climbing the flight of stairs once more he ignored the looks he got and thought carefully on what to do it this situation. Sam opened the door once they got there and turned on her heel to face Spencer. Wacking him on the shoulder to wake him from his trance she led him to his bedroom door.

"Get dressed and clean up your nose. I'll get Freddie's mom."

"Huh? Why are you getting her?" Curiosity filled his tone

Sam took a quick look back and spoke, "You are curious to why she doesn't care about you loving her son aren't you?"

He pondered on the question. It was true he was curious to why she didn't find the pairing disgusting. Also why she seemed so calm kind of sent a chill down his spine. She should be furious that one he was much older and a male, two he made a mistake and hurt her son, lastly he lost Freddie. So he supposed he would like to know the answer. Spencer nodded his head slightly.

"Alright then. Plus she may have a good plan since she is so paranoid, I mean she must have thought Freddie would get lost or something" Sam said as she left the room, her voice leaving as the apartment door opened and closed.

Spence pulled up some random articles of clothing and slipped into them. Not really checking for stains or anything of the sort. He left his room and plopped on the couch. Glad Sam had left for the moment he silently cried to himself. Muttering sorries to Freddie hoping in some way Freddie could hear or feel them.

Freddie shivered from the biting cold that nipped at the exposed skin. Feeling a fever beginning. He had hid himself behind a dumpster for the night and it kept the really harsh winds from blowing onto him. He felt dirty and cold which made to be the worst combo in such a situation as he was in. The blood had dried and flaked whenever he flexed his wrists to crack them.

A low sigh left Freddie's chapped lips at the thoughts of the events that rushed back to him. A shaky breath and wet tears slipped out. Betray hurt worse than cuts. Freddie loved Spencer more then he thought possible. Why was his life turning into such a shitty existence? It was Carly's fault. She started all this bullshit to begin with. Sure she did the right thing in telling him but she decided to make him feel low and unclean.

Growling like a dog, Freddie punched the dumpster, bruising and cutting his knuckles. The pain didn't register in his mind. The only thing that did was revenge. It was weird wimpy little Freddie who tried to stay out of such things suddenly wanted a piece. Crawling out from behind the green dumpster he stood, looking around to see if anyone was around. Not a soul seemed to mark the alley with their presence so he began to plan. Pacing back and forth, Freddie thought on what he should do.

Then it dawned on him, why not just confront Carly? Tell her off and demand to know why she was being such a damned bitch. It seemed simple enough though he knew there would be more in the actual event.

Rushing down the alley to the sidewalk he glanced around for a road sign. Once he located one Freddie realized he was only 12 blocks from the apartment building. With all the energy left within him he ran like there were furious dogs at his feet toward the building. Only hoping Spencer would be out on some errand.

I leave you with a cliffie! Only two more Chaps! Or Three! But that is it! I am sooo cruel I knowz! It wasn't very long but I seem to like to type when I am close to passing out so that is the reason why. I'll write it out tomorrow so it will be way longer! -___-


End file.
